Wonder Girl Spa Astoria

[patrick s]

maybe its cause i speak with a bk accent. i tend to speak a little fast but i drove by the spot. i dunno what times u guys are going to but i thought it had decent foot traffic. It can just be me. I am weird. I like to take the latest appointment and usually I go to the city at real late night spots just to avoid people.

 

[Del-dom]

No change from msg #10, months ago.

 

[Pinup]

Well, you can always just ask the address and drop it into google maps or a gps or whatever...

 

[UditaC]

phone lady is terrible at directions. and she doesn't understand what time do you close....

 

[No can do Obama!]

A cold wind whipped down 32nd Street and whistled through the menus for the Korean barbecue places before wending its way to Herald Square. A sheaf of papers pulled by the passing breeze blew by my feet as I ambled eastward and, looking left, I saw the source. A bunch of cardboard boxes on the curb had blown open and the contents were swirling in little paper eddies in the sky. Protruding prominently from one box, I spotted a large hardcover volume and pulled it out for further inspection.

"Massage Parlor: An Owner's Manual" was the title, authored by Jack Uhoff and Mercy Rubintug. I opened it up and looked at the table of contents. The topics jumped out at me. "Ad Pics and Where to Find Them." "The Ancient Art of the Upsell." "Plumbing."

I flipped eagerly to the "Plumbing" section and found a series of table shower diagrams...not the sort of plumbing I had hoped to see, but I was intrigued. I stuck the tome under my arm and brought it home, and have periodically dragged it out as a point of reference.

Yesterday, I happened to be in Queens - naturally, as you might expect from a man of my royal stature, I spend more time in the county of Kings, but Queens has plenty to offer and I am game to dabble when I can. I decided to make a side trip to Wonder Girls, a popular place noted for relatively young women, cute denim shorts, and the presence of two table showers under one roof. If that's not a winning combination, I don't know what is. A place in Queens fit for a King? I was destined to judge for myself.

An excerpt from "Massage Parlor: An Owner's Manual":


When they put Wonder Girls together they got almost everything basically right. The entrance is pretty non-descript and the location is just far enough from significant foot traffic to be fairly discreet.

Clearly the presence of dual table showers demonstrates rock-solid thinking in anticipation of volume business and is absolutely a feather in their caps. The place is clean and the rooms have real walls and doors.

Here's the thing - I have no idea whether the space was built for "legit" massage or what, but the short walls are a little bit of an issue here only because the visual privacy is so complete, you can easily forget that it's all basically one big room and that everyone can hear you. So...the illusion of privacy seems to encourage talking at conversational volumes which in turn is a bit too loud for the reality of the situation. Yes, monger who arrived at 11:30 am Friday and had a 4 or 5 minute "outside voice" conversation about the difference between the half hour and hour house fees, I'm talking about you...and yes, 40 plus 40 does equal 80 but monger math is special.

Apart from that, this is a perfectly fine place. I'm not sure I can fully appreciate the comments about the music - when I was there it was inoffensive sort of light jazz that I would never choose personally but was a welcome change from faux-Eastern muzak, for my money.

Another excerpt from "Massage Parlor: An Owner's Manual":


I was greeted by Sara, a cute girl I would guess somewhere in her late 20's. She told me she was 25 - I don't usually ask, but for some reason she showed an interest in me and asked my age so I thought it was only fair to return the favor. She's got a good solid body - particularly her nice B cups and full bottom half. She was the only girl I saw, though I believe there were two others hanging around in the shadows. She was playful and professional by turns - I half expected an absence of warmth and abundance of upsell here based on what I've read, but I am pleased to say I encountered neither.

Don't get me wrong - this girl is young and attractive, she has a nice full body and expressive eyes. Would you give her a second look in the subway? I probably would, but I get pretty bored on the train. As a general matter, for me its as much about things like sense of humor, empathy, and courtesy than cup size. Sara was professional but sharp-witted and even let her guard down a little with me and some sweetness showed through.

Again, an excerpt from "Massage Parlor: An Owner's Manual":


The massage was a workmanlike, professional accupressure-style rub. Perfectly average, good enough to relax you a bit but if you need a real massage I'll give you some numbers to call.

A final excerpt from "Massage Parlor: An Owner's Manual":


The post-flip service here is standard, every day handjob. and I'll bet you a New Year's Eve dinner date with my Shame Sherpa (if you don't know, don't ask...) there's minimal variation in the routine. YMAGVVMAA - your mileage ain't gonna vary very much at all.

Sara licked her way up the back of each leg and then planted a kiss on my ass, which made me laugh. She licked her way up the front of each leg, and of course I paused...hoping for the obvious...and she...kissed...my belly.

She oiled my cock as I put my hand on her ass, which felt very nice and firm. As her hand got faster and faster, I ran my hand over her nice, small but full breasts. I slid my hand under her shirt and into her bra, where I felt her hard nipples. And...I felt her hard nipples...and I felt her hard nipples...this was taking a long time. She shifted arms, I could tell she was committed, though, and wasn't going to give up. She kept at it until finally I came.

All things considered, Sara did a nice buildup that promised the world...and delivered a chunk of the Northern Hemisphere which was perfectly fine but an hour later I was hungry again.

Which worked out fine, because it was lunchtime and I was headed back to Koreatown. Who knew what the afternoon might bring?

My cost was 60 house and 60 tip. Broadly speaking, this trip might have been a disaster for me if Sara hadn't been quite so cute and nice. Replace her with someone who was principally about the ancient art of upsell, and the house of cards would start to collapse. My guess is that the varying impressions of the place aren't really about mileage differences as much as they are about attitude differences. The feeling that you're a valuable client, and not someone who's just there to have your wallet picked clean makes all the difference in the world when you've got to choose between two places that deliver roughly the same service for approximately the same price.

 

[Born in the USA]

Yes, we are on the same page.

 

[toto]

She wanted more than 40 for over the bra roaming privileges? They'll never get my thumbs up (not to mention other parts of the anatomy) with that kinda micro-haggle.

I mean, I try not to be a presumptuous pig about this stuff, but if you've oiled up my cock and started jacking me off we're generally on the same page as what sort of service is being offered, and I assume that at a minimum I'm allowed basic roaming without a negotiation. 40 bucks is, at this point, the standard tip and should pretty much include a handjob and roaming. If it doesn't, something has gone wrong.

Are we all on the same page about this?

 

[Los Angeles]

That's funny. I guess that some of these ladies try different tactics to up their daily income, that was a silly choice for her. From my experience, and I have very little, these ladies experience a very mixed bags of tips, from too little too much.


Unfortunately, a monger has an experience that mimics the session before.

 

[heather c]

She said I could touch her boooobies (bra still on).

I have gotten much better service out on Bell Blvd. It's about a 15-20 minute drive instead of the 5 -7 min drive to Astoria.

 

[Stan]

What was the nature of the upsell? Was it just a bump in tips or was more available?

 

[Exjwpsy]

If you're interested in the 11354 you should reach out to PP, he has been doing CIA grade reconnaissance @ the AMPs. Just don't let him touch your 1099

 

[MELINDA B]

That does sound shitty. Well, I could use a change of scenery every now and then and since I decline to leave the 5 boroughs unless absolutely necessary Queens is looking pretty good...On the other hand, it doesnt have to be this particular place this particular time. I could always go to flushing and do what I do elsewhere all the time - walk into a random place with a "Bodywork" sign and see what happens...

 

[Yep!!]

Just read that too. That guys review is atypical. Sara is definitely not big boned in the slightest. And attractiveness is obviously subjective. They've never played k-pop even ONCE of the couple times i've been, they typically have jazzy type music on. I think you're treatment at these places can also be based on your attitude coming in. I've been in there and overheard some really rude and not to mention loud mongers walking in and acting like they own the place, making demands and just having absolutely no class or respect.

 

[Robert E]

I started going here when it first opened and really enjoyed myself. It is clean and I always left satisfied. But the last time I was there I got the upsell during the ST. I am sure I did not understand what she said. She was pretty pissed at the end at the tip and started arguing with me.
Screw that shit. If I want an argument, I will stay at home with the wife. There are plenty of other AMPs out there that do not give an attitude. Later Wondergirls, it has been nice knowing you. On to Bell Blvd or the East Side.

 

[xtayxterrorx]

Wouldn't that confuse the shit out of all those trolls, heh heh heh...



Saw that myself...precisely why I thought it might be fun and educational to wander in as just another schmuck with a boner, a bad back and 120 bucks to burn...

 

[knownout]

The bohemian beer garden, not the guido filled one near Kaufman studios.

 

[vjejwuroilaizweob]

I suggest a trip to the beer garden afterwards.

 

[Pink Sugar]

I believe it is time for a rare King Otis sighting in the borough of Queens...[/QUOTE


A little bit of a heads up would be nice so we could put together some sort of welcoming party.

I would double check on the consistency of this place, I just read a contradictory review on SH.

 

[dukemack]

I believe it is time for a rare King Otis sighting in the borough of Queens...

 

[She said]

I would definitely agree. I think they definitely understand the value of having fresh faces. Unfortunately my patronage of their spot is inconsistent. There's rumor that more is being offered on the menu, that i've read on some other forums recently. more specifically, exactly one notch up from just a HR, and from newer girls. Will report back if I experience anything first hand!