Want to learn massage badly, but there's an obstacle. Help.

[riches no butler]

Hi, I'm an American but I just came here to Sydney, Australia for an extended visit. I really like it here, and think the city's beautiful. But I digress...

I've wanted to learn how to give massages for years. I got my first 3 last summer (the first was Thai, the last two were your typical Swedish variety). I loved them. The whole reason I want to learn how to give them is so I can trade with others and save some bucks. I hope even you professionals can sympathize with that. I found a great massage seminar here in Australia that lasts two weeks, and I'd love to get their basic, bare-bones certification.

Here's where the problem comes in. During my first few massages I was occasionally, momentarily and involuntarily aroused. I tried everything I could to fight this. I tried doing several successive math problems in my head as fast as I could, I imagined myself racing a bike downhill, I considered flora and fauna--anything I could to yank my body's response into a different direction. It actually worked a few times...before it came back.

Now I've read enough on these boards to know that this is a somewhat-common problem for men and it's "nothing to be ashamed of if you're not looking for it," but I don't want to respond that way. Period. It would put a huge damper on how the teachers and other massage students considered the legitimacy of my motivation to learn.

So, I've searched this board all over. Searched other massage boards all over. Googled a few different phrases. I want to "adjust" my body's paradigm and I haven't found any good advice on how to do it.

Should I just keep getting massages, hoping that my body will "learn" that it's receiving in a nonsexual context (a plan of desensitization)? I'm afraid that my body would respond the same way (though probably not to the same degree) when giving massages as well. Obviously, this isn't acceptable either.

My desire to learn massage, for all the right reasons, is great. But I don't feel like I can take advaneforum.xxxe of all the hands-on (no pun intended) learning opportunities until I can get control of my body's response. I'd be thrilled with any advice you have for me. I really need to get this issue solved.

I apologize if I've come off sounding like a troll. I just need help. Bad.

 

[Spirits Alive]

Firstly, if you are considering the 10 day lomi lomi course that I most people in Australia do (from your user name not your post), it won't matter, it's mainly footwark for a few days, then the massage is almost all face down. Read the course details and it will probably say some thing like "back legs and arms", Level III is when you get to turn over. Even if you do get to turn over, the draping will cover it - the draping is minimal compared to other styles, but it is all bunched up over your area of concern, and anything going on in the bunched up draping is not a noticable as you may think. It will probably turn into a non-issue fairly quickly. Do take some snug fitting underwear to put on when you get off the table to keep everything close to you - once you are off the table all the "it sometimes happens on the table" no longer applies.

Have you received a lomi lomi massage? ( you mention the style of the first 3, not sure if they are the only 3) Why are you so interested in lomi lomi?
Almost any beginners massage course will start with the back and back of legs first. By the time you get to turn over (a few days into the course), you probably will be OK with it all.

People have previosuly suggested that you might like to take care of it beforehand, but if it's the live-in lomi lomi 10 day course I'm thinking of, taking care of things beforehand may be just as much of a challenge. (you don't get a certificate until you complete Level III)

 

[Lill Iren F]

Thanks for your response! To answer your points...

Firstly, if you are considering the 10 day lomi lomi course that I most people in Australia do (from your user name not your post), it won't matter, it's mainly footwark for a few days, then the massage is almost all face down.

The Lomi Lomi course I'm considering is run by a group called Touch of Aloha. They offer a 1-week course in Beginner's Lomi and a 2nd week for Advanced Lomi (true, you're probably not going to actually be advanced in two weeks, but I digress...).

Have you received a lomi lomi massage? ( you mention the style of the first 3, not sure if they are the only 3)

No, not yet. And yes, the 3 that I mentioned were the only ones.

Why are you so interested in lomi lomi?

1.) Because of what I've read about the mental effect. Apparently, the movements of a Lomi Lomi practitioner are so random-feeling that the recipient's body is unable to focus and predict them, so the brain shuts off. I experienced the converse during my Swedish massages. I found it extremely relaxing physically, but honestly, I spent a lot of time "following" the masseuse's movements with my mind. Lomi Lomi isn't supposed to have this issue. I've heard it described as "trance-like."

2.) I have calluses on the fingers of my left hand from playing guitar. Lomi Lomi involves primarily the forearms, so my left hand shouldn't count against me too much.

3.) I want to be different. Not many people are trained in Lomi Lomi! I've also lived in Hawai'i (O'ahu) and feel close to the culture. Lomi Lomi would be a way of reconnecting of sorts.

Almost any beginners massage course will start with the back and back of legs first. By the time you get to turn over (a few days into the course), you probably will be OK with it all.

Ah, great! That's good to know.

If I may ask, do you have any experience in Lomi Lomi? If so, what do you think about it? Is it all it's cracked up to be?

 

[David]

I am a client and have posted about Lomi Lomi here in the past.

I have now had nine sessions, about one per month. Lately, I have been going every three weeks, which is about right for me.

There is a huge difference in lomi lomi styles. The trance like mental state and profound life-altering experience comes for me only with the Temple Style after the manner of Abraham Kawai'i. (My one Auntie Margaret style massage did not work for me) I was fortunate to find a very serious and disciplined Sacred Hawaiian Temple Style practitioner to work on me.

I wish I had kept a diary. I have seen visions/dreams of riding the backs of dolphins and whales. I have see outlines of people in the room. I have had tremendous rushes of energy and emotional releases. And, all of this has had very stong beneficial effects on my body and soul. I have come a long ways and transformed into a new person.

I have been able to eliminate those recurring flashbacks of past negative experiences. I have been able to change habitual behaviors. The sessions release me from the ties to past experiences. I now live in the present. I feel free to change my life in any way I choose how to live and what to do without the weight of bad habits controlling me. The sessions break those old ties and release me.

My first session was in October on Maui. Today, I at my ideal weight, something I have been unable to do for 35 years. I have completely changed my diet. I run five miles 3 or 4 times a week. I am calm, peaceful, and satisfied with my life. I feel connected to everything around me. I am more sensitive, positive, and healthy. I read the Urban Shaman by Serge King. I try to practice Huna everyday.

As for the massages, every one has been different -- no two have ever been the same. Recently, they seem to me to be about balancing the energy of the chakras, especially, the heart which feels as if it was first opened recently and is very strong. The energy generated is amazing and causes deep powerful releases. I find that I am so spent at the end that I cannot muster the strength to move for several minutes. My practitioner always provides a light meal after the session to revive me and discuss what happened. She says she get "lomied" too and eats along with me. Sharing the experience is one of the most valuable aspects of it. The sessions have been long, sometimes lasting over three hours. It is the most intimate you can be with another person that doesn't involve sex.

During a recent session, I felt the touch of the ancestors, I heard them speaking to me, telling me how to live. My practitioner rocked her hands on the soles of my feet and I believed I was walking with them. Without speaking a word to each other during the session, we felt the same presence. It was very spiritual and uplifting.

I now sometimes have visions and energy rushes between sessions. I have felt them when looking at the moon over the ocean, when looking at a bush in bloom, and when entering a church on Mother's Day. They are very powerful reminders of the changes I am experiencing.

I can now feel and recognize negative energy in other people. I have also experienced a spiritual connection with some. I have a new strong desire to help others. I have connected with several individuals in my daily work that I have been able to help recently and I believe I may have avoided or overlooked them in my pre-lomi lomi life. Life is more satisfying and meaningful.

I am a changed person today thanks to lomi lomi and my dedicated practitioner. I have a strong powerful "aloha" connection to her. I bless her as a powerful shaman and healer.

The world needs more lomi lomi practitioners!

Please learn,

(P.S. Don't worry about the arousal. It happens to me sometimes. There is so much going on, it will never be a factor. Focus on your mind and all your body. What's going on with that one organ will seem too minor to be a concern and certainly should not effect the session or your relationship with the practitioner. It's just like getting "goose bumps" You didn't make it happen on purpose, it's noticable sometimes, and no one really cares.)

Dan

 

[Princesa Z]

Hi
I am a Kahuna massage practitioner (temple style Lomi Lomi) about 1 1/2hrs north of Sydney. Also An American living in Australia, but I have been here for 42 years.
I trained with Mettes institute in Queensland so I cannot comment on "Touch of Aloha"

I would say Go for it and don't worry about the way your body is currently reacting. As well as being a physiological reaction, it is also a learned association that touch=sex.
Learning massage will liberate you to the other possiblities of touch.
An erection during a massage is not a disaster or cause for concern unless the receiver makes sexual requests. Do make sure you are pointing towards your feet rather than lying on it at the start of the massage.
Dan's advice above is also very good.

 

[cfc9elc]

Why are you so interested in lomi lomi?

1.) Because of what I've read about the mental effect. Apparently, the movements of a Lomi Lomi practitioner are so random-feeling that the recipient's body is unable to focus and predict them, so the brain shuts off. I experienced the converse during my Swedish massages. I found it extremely relaxing physically, but honestly, I spent a lot of time "following" the masseuse's movements with my mind. Lomi Lomi isn't supposed to have this issue. I've heard it described as "trance-like."

I find the exact opposite to be true - the strokes are so predictable that the brain doesn't bother following them after the intial few, everything is repeated so much it just flows together.

[2.) I have calluses on the fingers of my left hand from playing guitar. Lomi Lomi involves primarily the forearms, so my left hand shouldn't count against me too much.

I wouldn't worry about calluses too much with any form of massage much - they will soften up pretty quickly with exposure to a lot of oil (is loosing the calluses a concern - you still get a lot of oil on hands during lomi lomi) I wouldn't recommend specialising in facial massage with calluses, but it doesn't sound like you're interested in that direction currently.

[3.) I want to be different. Not many people are trained in Lomi Lomi! I've also lived in Hawai'i (O'ahu) and feel close to the culture. Lomi Lomi would be a way of reconnecting of sorts.

not sure if want to be different is a good reason - want to be different to what? To 99% of the population knowing how to give a good massage in any style is pretty different....... If you intend on going back to the US and being a temple style lomi lomi practitioner, I'd actually recommend you study with one of the US-based schools - it will give you more credibility than training with some unknown (to them) somewhere else. Overseas continuing education can be GREAT, but it usually helps to have local initial training, just for the recognition. Overseas training by itself can look like you've gone somewhere it is easier to get qualifications, locally recognised qualifications PLUS overseas training makes you an expert prepared to search out the best teachers. Just people's perceptions. But there is no harm training with one lomi lomi school and going and doing more training with another - just be prepared they will always want you to start from scratch in their system.

If I may ask, do you have any experience in Lomi Lomi? If so, what do you think about it? Is it all it's cracked up to be?

I'm a temple style practitioner, over 400hr training, plus formal qualifications in massage and aromatherapy, beauty therapy, stone therapy, and pregnancy massage. I am extremely glad I did my lomi lomi training when I did (very early in my massage training, it's been invaluable throughout pretty well everything else I've done)



Touch of Aloha trained with Mette's Institute originally, did some other training in Hawaii, and went and set up their own school. They used to be quite open about their lineage on their website, they don't seem to be as open anymore (they want all your details before they let you past the home page - I wouldn't do fill out contact details on an unknown website in a hurry). I think their courses are usually much smaller than those at Mette's, but they do teach temple style lomi lomi. I recommend you investigate Mette's http://www.mettesinstitute.com.au too. You'll end up doing whatever course you're meant to.

 

[Happeh Gurl C:]

not sure if want to be different is a good reason - want to be different to what?

Different from the majority of American massage practitioners. My ultimate goal is to learn so that after I come back to America I'll be ready to trade massages with others. If I'm one of a smaller group of Lomi Lomi guys, the greater scarcity of my particular style of massage should give me a better bargaining chip for trading. I'm sorry if that sounds clinical, but I'm pretty sure that high demand/curiosity + low supply = advaneforum.xxxe for me. Over the course of the next several years, the cost of my training should be far cheaper than what I'd otherwise be paying if I had to shell out $90-120 for each individual massage over the same period of time. The only cost in trading is the cost of learning and a little bit of time reciprocated for each massage received--that's not difficult.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems practical!


Thanks to everyone else for their replies.

 

[Andrew Ho]

I think you are getting way ahead of yourself with planning trading when you return home, but it seems to be something you are interested in.....

I don't recommend you select something to study because you think there will be a demand for trades in that modality, there are way too many other factors involved.

Who are you planning on trading with? Many professional massage therapists DON'T trade massage for massage, and are highly unlikely to trade professional massage services with a hobby massage practitioner, unusual modality or not. many practitioners are happy to PAY for sessions, they may work on the person that just gave them a massage, either then or later, but they will PAY for it, it takes all the scheduling challenges out of the equation, you get what you pay for, all much less complicated.

If you want to trade with hobby massage practitioners, and they are not lomi lomi practitioners, you will probably end up feeling like you want a lomi lomi session, not one of their hobby massage treatments. Temple style lomi lomi does do so much more than standard massage in a session, and the sessions are usually longer than a standard massage, you're probably going to feel you're missing out when trading with hobby massage practitioners. It would be like you lending someone your Rolls Royce for a month and then they lend you their rusty '80s Honda Civic for a day and consider it a fair trade, a car is a car.

Also where you are returning to in the US may affect your ability to trade - some areas are less interested or totally not interested in lomi lomi, finding someone that is interested may be a challenge.

 

[cutie pie]

I don't recommend you select something to study because you think there will be a demand for trades in that modality, there are way too many other factors involved.

That was only the third reason. The first reason I consider to be the most important, and it finds Lomi Lomi unique. I'm pretty sure I'm making the right decision about this, but of course I always have open ears.

Who are you planning on trading with?

I was planning on trading with local people that I'd meet on massageexchange.com and freerub.com.

If you want to trade with hobby massage practitioners, and they are not lomi lomi practitioners, you will probably end up feeling like you want a lomi lomi session, not one of their hobby massage treatments. Temple style lomi lomi does do so much more than standard massage in a session, and the sessions are usually longer than a standard massage, you're probably going to feel you're missing out when trading with hobby massage practitioners. It would be like you lending someone your Rolls Royce for a month and then they lend you their rusty '80s Honda Civic for a day and consider it a fair trade, a car is a car.

Hmm... I guess I could hope to find a Lomi Lomi practitioner on MassageExchange or FreeRub? If not, I guess I just have to deal with it. But honestly, I wouldn't consider the two Swedish massages I've had so far to be analogous to rusty '80s Honda Civics, anyway.

I loved them!

Also where you are returning to in the US may affect your ability to trade - some areas are less interested or totally not interested in lomi lomi, finding someone that is interested may be a challenge.

I live in the greater Los Angeles area. I figure this should afford me a pretty wide choice.

 

[conservativegirl]

I wouldn't consider the two Swedish massages I've had so far to be analogous to rusty '80s Honda Civics, anyway.

That's because you have not had a temple style lomi lomi