Massage & *Sex*? On being a therapist ...

[all i need is an answer]

Furthermore, although I am raising personal topics, they are personal topics as they related to the profession.

Here's the flaw in your thinking.....in your mind our sex lives are related to our profession....in our minds the two subjects never intersect....they're totally unrelated.

That is because you are not a professional massage therapist. I think the reason the line is blurry for hobbyists (such as yourself) is that you tend to practice massage therapy on spouses, significant others, and other people you're intimate with. Most people in a hobby setting have the experience of massage being blended with, or ending with sex. Although this may not be true all the time, it's true enough of the time that sex & massage can become connected in your mind. With professionals, obviously that isn't the case. There is nothing sexual about the massages we (professional massage therapists) provide for our clients. For an ethical professional massage therapist, there is no struggle to keep the lines clear. It's automatic. We are looking at the body from a holistic medical perspective. Our focus is muscle, fascia, circulation, lymphatic flow, joint range of motion, postural abnormalities, nerve impingements, etc. Not exactly hot stuff. If a professional massage therapist looked at client's bodies from a sexual perspective instead, then they are in the wrong career.

You may not like our answers, but the truth is, we aren't your peers, so our experiences don't (and won't) match your own. That may offend you. Nonetheless, that's the case.

:iagree:

Angie

 

[Happy Happy]

Perhaps my initial line of questioning was not the best one to get at all of this. Please excuse this. I have absolutely no interest in how MT affects your individual sex lives. However, I very much DO have an interest in my own.

What BJB-LMP alluded to above is precisely what I was hoping for insight along the lines of. Any further elaboration would be quite productive and helpful, as currently, I cannot help but view it all as what BJB-LMP very eloquently described as, "some kind of entangled mystery."

Does anyone have a detangler?

Huh, I didn't realize you had to go through Med School to be a SPIN Doctor:!:

 

[Jv J]

You state that in your professional experience the divide between sexual and therapeutic touch GROWS rather than narrows. However, as I described and you have pointed out, I have found the opposite. To me the distinction has become more nuanced and subtle.
Does anyone have a detangler?

You state that you are a first year. You should have had en ethics class by now.
If your lines/boundaries are becoming "nuanced and subtle" /(blurred) you seriously need to talk to one of your professors.

Robyn

 

[mshatswell]

Dear group,

As this will be my last reply on this subject, I would first like to say that it is unfortunate we have gotten off on such a wrong foot. From other posts on this board, I am sure you are all pleasant people, and and from my experiences with MT's in real life, we would probably get along quite well in any other context.

I would also like to say, though, that, if anything, I have found the condescension and insinuated attacks on my character, maturity, and grasp of clinical ethics far less professional than the potential ‘inappropriateness’ of the subject matter on which this thread has focussed. I have been genuinely disappointed by the quick-to-judgement replies on the whole and seeming lack of interest in fielding a newcomer seeking perspective on a more-than-hobby interest.

On the plus side, though, I suppose the jabs and 'is this appropriate' debate have likely only gotten me to the personal conclusions and answers I was seeking faster than I would have on my own, and thus been productive, in their own off-topic and unproductive way. As for my person, I am confident enough about myself not to be significantly bothered by any of it on a personal level, so for the more empathetic readers, there is no need to worry about that either.

The subject is now happily concluded in my mind. I have come full circle and have been able to, through my own stream of consciousness, answer all the questions I asked on my own more than sufficiently, and perhaps in a way only I ever could for myself.

For those who are at all interested or open to them, these answers follow.


Final Thoughts:

I always had a tendency to overanalyze. Personally, I find it one of my better traits, because it keeps me always considering subjects a little bit deeper than the next person, and generally makes me become better versed in them than I would otherwise.

What put my analysis on the MT subject into perspective and conclusion for me was considering another hobby I enjoy greatly and have gone through a similar type of transformation in understanding: music.

When I was younger, I would listen to music solely for the overall impact of the music. I had no ability to discern the individual instruments or pick out chord progressions, so my listening was absolute in its simplicity.

After a decade of intense playing/writing, however, my perspective on music shifted completely. I no longer heard a song on the radio as just a song; rather, I began to hear and appreciate the components individually: the bass line, the chord progressions, the rhythm and intensity of the drums, the tone and texture of the vocals, etc..

At first this was also very disorienting for me. I found that, suddenly, music had changed.

Asking fellow musicians about this subject, though, I found it is not a universal change all musicians go through. Some of my friends have played music their whole life, and have in no way been affected in this same way. Listening for them is still the same experience it was when they first fell in love with it all in their early years. They still can’t tell the difference between a vi-IV-I-IV and a I-V-vi-IV to hear them or pick out the melody of a bass underlying a riff.

For them, once they put down the guitar, they simultaneously put down all the theory they have learned and leave it all behind.

Personally, I would never have it this way. When I do listen to the radio, I continue to distinctly hear all the elements I described above. I am happy that I do, as, in my opinion, it makes me a better listener and allows me to appreciate good music on a finer level.

Much in the same way has my perception of the human body been shifted by my involvement and learning of MT. As with music, there was a time when I appreciated the body on only a superficial level. Back then, a shoulder was just a shoulder, and nothing more.

However, with what I have learned, much like with music, I again have begun to appreciate the components I overlooked before: the distinction of muscle groups, insertions and origins, fibre directions, tenseness/laxity, etc..

I am sure that many MTs are like my guitar friends, and leave all this understanding behind once they leave their clinics, and once again, a shoulder becomes just a shoulder and a back just a back. Personally, I couldn’t imagine living this way, though, as I feel I’d be missing out on so much that is wonderful about the human body, much like I would with music if I could not analyze in the ways I can now when I listen.

I can say with certainty now that I genuinely have noticed this change in perception in all areas of life, and I I wouldn’t have it any other way.

To state it bluntly, have I noticed this new understanding affecting my sex life? I can say now with absolute lucidity that it has. Was I surprised and disoriented to find this? Absolutely as well, though the context of it all is quite clear to me now:

Learning music refined my ability to appreciate and interact with music. Learning the body has changed the way I appreciate and interact with the human form. This has taken place for both on all levels, and similarly with music, I feel it has been an immensely positive effect.

With the above, all other questions in this thread I have posed are easily answered. Any others are no doubt irrelevant, as I suppose that, again, like music, each person will come to an understanding of these topics on their own personal level.


Signing off,
Mike

 

[White House Watching]

considering this post...ew!