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Mens Rules...

Discussion in 'Jokes and Funny Stuff' started by nico312, May 8, 2012.

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  1. nico312

    nico312 New Member

    May 6, 2012
    ahahahahahahaahhahahahah nice, thx
  2. Crispian N

    Crispian N New Member

    Nov 1, 2010
    We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
    These are our rules:
    Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
    1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
    1. Crying is blackmail.
    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    1. 'Yes' and 'No' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question
    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for
    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor
    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days
    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us
    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
    1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done
    Not both
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself
    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials
    1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we
    1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have no idea what mauve is.
    1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle
    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear
    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, Really
    1. You have enough clothes
    1. You have too many shoes
    1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
    1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.

    Source - EMail...
  3. summer bear

    summer bear New Member

    Jan 6, 2010
    hahahahaha nice 1..
  4. Hello There

    Hello There New Member

    Oct 6, 2010
    and i hope you live by these rulz... if not . i`m coming for inspection.. and get your babe along tooo. :bleh:
  5. ocularnervosa

    ocularnervosa New Member

    Oct 11, 2010
    Lol.. Sure.. Come for an Inspection.. Lets see if your worthless magnet works :rofl:... J/k.. :p
  6. ubermeisters

    ubermeisters Member

    Oct 2, 2009
    Worthless Magnet....................:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
  7. Jolene L

    Jolene L Member

    Apr 21, 2010
    Hotmail forward.
    Not bad though.
  8. Ecgferreara

    Ecgferreara New Member

    Jan 21, 2011
    1. Crying is blackmail --> :hoho: is that true?
    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one --> this means men are lazier than women in thinking, right??? Something cant be spoken by words but just feel with heart n minds :p
  9. Rubix

    Rubix Member

    May 15, 2010
    We're not lazier, we want...clear instructions....as If we do it our way, it would again make girls whine, sad & angry.
  10. Kittysue

    Kittysue Member

    Dec 2, 2009
    Really true :D
  11. luvmfabt

    luvmfabt New Member

    Jan 26, 2011
    Wow...nice one Aditya!!!

    Wish these rules could be made to be followed by them one day :p
  12. J D Williams

    J D Williams Newbie

    Jun 22, 2013
    Ok... that made tea come out of my nose LMAO
  13. leech

    leech Newbie

    Sep 22, 2013
    this needs to continue
  14. ballcap

    ballcap Newbie

    Jan 26, 2014
    Women have all the rules when they marry a man
  15. sajet07

    sajet07 Newbie

    Apr 23, 2014
  16. Logical_Guy

    Logical_Guy Newbie

    Jun 7, 2014
    rules to abide by... or not?
  17. oswald

    oswald Newbie

    Jun 18, 2014
    very true!!
  18. jasonlovely1999

    jasonlovely1999 Newbie

    Jul 17, 2014
    true rules. but how many of us dare to say it. ha ha
  19. MassagingGenie

    MassagingGenie Newbie

    Aug 7, 2014
    Canada Baby
    lol so true
  20. AXHandsome

    AXHandsome Newbie

    Jul 19, 2014
    Well said .....

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