Thanks for all the replies and advice.
I do see this as an addiction. When you’re done busting a nut u feel like u can walk away, but after some time it builds back and u go for another fix.
For those wondering why I started in the first place, just lost interest at home. Love the wife, but after a while it becomes mechanical. Jerking off is boring, I thought a bit more interesting to have a hot girl do it for you. Getting older, you just tire if monotony and the usual routine of life.
I think one of my main concerns is risk for STI. Seems almost nobody ever posts about getting STI’s, even the vets that have done this for years. Hard to believe. I don’t have anything (knock on wood), but with the published stats on HSV hard to believe that SP’s don’t have it.
Anyhow, to the cats that can carry this burden - more power to you. I myself want to quit but I know staying quit is hard after the genie is out of the bottle. One option is to avoid extras, but thats like giving a sip of cognac to an alcoholic.